Lately we’ve not been in touch much in this blog space.  I’d like to tell you it’s because we’ve been rubbing elbows with celebrities.  Although Katherine Heigl did recently try one of our organic grass-fed franks, that’s not why we’ve been absentee bloggers.

The real reason is that this blogger can’t remember the new password to access the inner-workings of the Franktuary website.  These days you can’t be too secure.  Unless, of course, you’re so secure you can’t remember your own passwords.

What a month, folks.  Since late July our truck has had to have reconstructive surgery, a large refrigerator in the store has gone down, the IRS has mistakenly fined us over $700, several minor things have broken, and our website has been compromised.  When it rains, it pours, yes?

But things could be worse.  We’ve also experienced several weeks of record setting sales, had a parade of old friends and far-away supporters visit Pittsburgh, and brought our revamped truck to the sets of two major film productions.  In fact, Katherine Heigl is now counted among the people who have tried Franktuary and enjoyed the experience!

Mr. Toad’s got nothing on Franktuary’s wild ride.

Alice Waters advocates grass-fed franks!

We are thrilled to make our first neighborhood lunch visit! Find us THIS FRIDAY, somewhere on Jane Street between 25th and 27th. Please help spread the word to friends and co-workers!

Franktuary Mobile
Friday, 16 July
12 to 1:30 pm

Organic locally farmed grass-fed beef Frankfurter – small – $3.50
Organic locally farmed grass-fed beef Frankfurter – large – $5.50
Organic locally farmed grass-fed beef Sliders – 2 for $5.50

Carrot Dog – marinated grilled carrot! – $3
Veggie Dog – $3.50

French Fries – $3
Fried Dill Pickle Chips – $3

Sodas, Bottled Water – $2

We prefer cash but can take credit cards via Square and our iPad!

If you don’t see the truck, check out our Twitter feed – we’ll be live updating! www.twitter.com/franktuary

www.franktuary.com

Earlier today the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette rolled out a nice piece on the very best fountains in Pittsburgh. Notably, Franktuary did not make the list.  And that’s exactly how it should be.

Since 2007, Franktuary has been without a soda fountain.  Those of you who go far enough back may remember the one that used to call our counter home.  What I’m sure none of you remember is the time its water line exploded overnight causing the entire kitchen to flood.  We used a giant squeegee to move water to our drain which, brilliantly, was installed at the high point of our floor.  But that has nothing to do with why we gave our fountain the axe.

It had to go because all of the soda options it offered came with a healthy dose of high fructose corn syrup.  Today we’re proud to say that not a single beverage in the store –soft drink or otherwise– contains HFCS.

Of course, we like fountains of the kind the Post-Gazette references every bit as much as the next frankfurter emporium in the back of a historic gothic cathedral.  Don’t for a moment think that Franktuary doesn’t appreciate a good public display of artistically flowing recirculated water.  In fact, we know the perfect place for Pittsburgh’s next great fountain.  Right across the street from us, where that half-demolished dusty, debris-filled malodorous eyesore of an abandoned building currently sits.  Yes, that would be a welcome change.

Franktuary is now visiting ModCloth on Monday afternoons.  I’ll bet you wished you worked at ModCloth right about now.

Well, how about the next best thing?  Instead of changing jobs, contact Franktuary about visiting your place of employment with its new truck.  We’re actively looking for good spots to serve lunch (or dinner) to hungry people.  If you’ve got guaranteed parking, that’s a definite plus.

Don’t hesitate to contact us with your ideas.  412.288.0322.

The furries have come and gone from their annual convention, held in Pittsburgh for what must be something like five consecutive years now.  It hardly seems out of place to see a fox tail or bat wings attached to a human being walking down Liberty Avenue anymore.  I guess you could say they’ve marked their territory.

The G-20 is back at it, severely inconveniencing the daily lives of the good people of Toronto this time around.  In Pittsburgh the G-20 accomplished nothing useful while crippling any number of small businesses, including my own.  Sour grapes you may say, but I’m hardly the only person who thinks this way.  I can only hope that Toronto fares better than did we.

Don’t take my word for it, though.  Read the thoughts of conservative columnist David Frum.

Then consider that treehugger.com seconds his opinion.  If those two sources are in agreement, then shouldn’t you hear them out?

Furthermore, the Canadian Press has found it worthwhile to interview Pittsburgh business owners about the disaster that was the G-20 Summit in western Pennsylvania.

Well, friends, Franktuary is not yet finished with its G-20 experience.  The bitter lemons forced upon us by the heavy hand of international government have yet to be made into lemonade.  But, oh, how those lemons are ripening.  Plans are in the works to appropriately observe the one year anniversary of Pittsburgh’s G20 debacle.  And after reading these articles, we might just be able to round up some international partners.  More on this topic when the time is right.

In a stirring tribute to Peter Pan, Major League Baseball has scheduled a special interleague series between your Pittsburgh Pirates and the Cleveland Indians this weekend at PNC Park.*

And if pirates and indians don’t do it for you there’s another good reason to visit the North Side this weekend.  Specifically, there’s a good reason to visit the Mattress Factory on Sunday afternoon.  There may be a certain food truck involved between 12 pm and 5 pm.

*Please note: The role of the Lost Boys, who never grow up, will also be played by your Pittsburgh Pirates.

Well, not really.  It’s just that an individual I know recently defined a nudist as “someone who only wears clothes when they make her more comfortable.”  That describes my mother perfectly.  All the time she feels more comfortable in clothes, and all the time she wears them.