Heeeelllloooo downtown Pittsburgh! Today you ate lunch. You ate lunch early and you ate lunch often. Keep up the good work, folks.

Well, football season is almost upon us. Chances are that means a whole lot more to you than it does to me, a transplant who just can’t get excited about Pittsburgh’s favorite obsession. You know, I’m an avid fan of some sports, but that gridiron game… I’ll never understand what all the fuss is about. I don’t dislike it, mind you. It’s more about how the HYPE IS WAY UP HERE and the product is way down here.

What little it does mean to me is rather important, though. It means that the Roethlisfurter and the Palu(malu)nesian should be surfacing soon. It also means school is starting. Never a pleasant thing in my book, but something that might admittedly be of some importance.

Lastly, we bid adieu to Drew.