So here I am in New Jersey, and guess what? I’m bringing a souvenir back to Pittsburgh!

My parents have a very steep driveway. It’s quite icy right now. This morning my dad, try as he might, could not get his car up the driveway. This evening I helped him get his car back in the garage. It was perilously close to a birch tree, and to avoid said foliage it needed a good solid push.

The thing is, I only brought a “nicer” pair of shoes with me on this trip because I’m going to see a Broadway show tomorrow afternoon. What I mean by a “nicer” pair of shoes, of course, is a pair of shoes without any traction whatsoever.

After successfully pushing my dad’s car safely clear of the tree in question, I headed back up his driveway. While attempting to cross it and safely reach the front yard I slipped on the solid yet sloped sheet of ice that is currently in place. I landed directly on my right cheek and slid all the way back down the driveway. The slide itself was quite a fun ride. Needless to say, though, I now have a very rosy cheek!

Prior to all that happening my grandmother received 80 Idaho potatoes (4073) from my relative “Pat” as a birthday gift. You better believe there’s a great story behind that one!

Among other things, my sister also purchased a chocolate fountain specifically for this celebration. The champagne and Corona flowed freely, and many of my relatives, all true New Yorkers, spoke excitedly of the Yankees upcoming season and the season tickets that a select few of them should soon be receiving in the mail.

In case you’re wondering, it’s safe to say you’re a true New Yorker when you consider driving to New Jersey an adventure and/or a trip into the country.

Then there’s my Uncle Tony, who has migrated to Maine and currently holds the family record for visits to Hot D***a. In fact, he might be in Pittsburgh on business this Tuesday. He offered great words of wisdom pertaining to a certain situation I currently find myself entangled in. “I lost a lot of money when I was older than you,” remarked Tony, “and I made it all back.” Here, here!

And all this while, Orbitz, my flight planner for this little weekend excursion, is still leaving me voice mails informing me that my flight is delayed and I won’t be arriving in Newark until tomorrow afternoon at 5 pm. Sometimes I love my life so much!