A certain business partner of mine recently had a wedding and is now enjoying a honeymoon in Costa Rica. I’m not going to lie. Attending weddings, especially when it’s very hot out, has never been one of my favorite things. This wedding was nice, but it definitely made me realize some things.

Should I ever find myself in a marital predicament I would like to have a wedding steak. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to sound ungrateful, but the food at this most recent wedding was essentially squirrel food. By squirrel food I mean nuts, berries, and granola. I like all those things a lot, but for me to fill up on such fare would take about three hours of constant consumption. Cake is great, but sugary foods are hard to stomach in extreme heat.

Well, okay, so I really only realized one thing. More people should have wedding steaks (with nuts and berries on the side) at their weddings. My wedding steak will be hot off the grill, multi-tiered, and slathered in a barbecue sauce icing.

Now I just need to find a woman who finds this concept appealing. Perhaps that’s the real marital predicament.